My boyfriend doesn’t like snowballing, which I’m fine with, however he won’t even kiss me after oral sex, even if I’ve already swallowed. I feel like he sees me as dirty or nasty when he refuses to kiss me after oral sex. He says he wouldn’t ask me to do something I don’t want to do, so I shouldn’t ask him to kiss me after I get him off with my mouth. I told him that I’m not going to give him oral sex if he won’t kiss me after it’s over. He says that’s fine. I am so annoyed by this. Am I being unreasonable? –San Francisco Fan
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First things first: Some of my very young, very old, or very sheltered readers (hello there, mom) are no doubt asking themselves, “What is this snowballing shit?” Well, simply kissing someone who’s just finished giving you head isn’t snowballing. That’s just gratitude, appropriately expressed. When a couple snowballs, the person giving (PG) head doesn’t swallow after the person receiving (PR) comes. Instead, the PG retains the semen in his or her mouth and then kisses the PR. As they kiss, the PG passes the wad of semen into the PR’s mouth. Yes, I know: yuck. But it’s not over. The PR passes his come back into the PG’s mouth, who passes it back into the PR’s mouth, who passes it back into the PG’s mouth–and back and forth the wad of semen goes, mixing with more and more saliva, getting bigger and bigger with each pass–snowballing, get it?–until either the PG or the PR decides to swallow or spit or one or the other or both of them drowns.
To sum up: Just because you get off on being seen doesn’t mean everyone else on earth is obligated to get off on seeing you. If you really want people to watch your wife suck your dick, make some amateur porn and let ’em rent the video.
What were you thinking when you advised a 40-year-old guy to tell a 20-year-old barista about his sexual feelings for her? I was thinking about writing you to complain when a barista who works in the coffeehouse I run informed me that a man told her he had written the letter about her! Gross! Who wants to serve someone while possessing the knowledge that he “spends way too much time thinking about exploding his rocket” all over you?!
