A couple of months ago you invited women to send in cunnilingus tips for straight guys. We’re still waiting for that column, Dan. What gives? Didn’t any women send in tips?
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Don’t get me wrong, ladies. I am all for cunnilingus. Women deserve it, and straight men, in my opinion, are obligated to provide it. But still. I’m as pro cunnilingus as a gay man can get. Even so, spending a week reading hundreds of detailed letters about cunnilingus, picking out the best ones, and editing them into a column is something I can easily put off. Indefinitely. I guess you could say I’m pro cunnilingus in the abstract. I’m pro eating pussy the same way I’m, say, pro round-the-clock home nursing for incontinent paraplegics. I’m glad it happens, I just don’t want to do it. Or think about it. Or spend a week reading about it. But I promised you a cunnilingus column, SGAFP, and a cunnilingus column you shall have.
But what about my gay male readers? Columns about cunnilingus have something to offer straight men, straight women, and lesbians, but nothing to offer gay men. So to give my gay readers a reason to slog through this column, I’ve included an item of particular interest to gay men at the end.
Saliva, saliva, saliva: I can’t overemphasize the importance of plenty of lubrication.
No, wait–use your teeth to nibble, boys.
–Word of the Day
I dated a guy who used “the alphabet song” to guide him along. Basically, he hummed the “A, B, C, D, E, F, G / H, I, J, K, LMNOP” song while drawing the letters with his tongue on my clit. He did it at the same pace of the song (long G, quick LMNOP, etc), and by the time he got to Z, I was shaking. Now every time I hear the alphabet song I get wet!
